“Let Old Things Die”

Kylo Ren said to Rey in Star Wars: The Last Jedi, “It’s time to let old things die…”

I realize this is possibly a controversial set of statements, and before you get all up in arms about how this is black-and-white thinking or some other such argument, remember to apply dialectical thinking and open-mindedness (see yesterday’s rant – the link is somewhere below 😉 ).

More than one idea (of contrasting value) can be true.

And…

When you set aside your beliefs and opinions (if even for a five minute read), you may learn something you had not considered.

So don’t throw the Star Wars quotes out with the bath water, and prepare to consider some concepts about death, letting go, and impermanence.

It just might help you relax a little 😉

The Effect of Death

Let’s get this out of the way so we can move onto more exciting metaphysical concepts.

Generally speaking, people do NOT like to be reminded about their death.

There are plenty of studies which demonstrate that when people are primed to consider their own death (consciously or subliminally), they feel anxiety, perform basic functions worse, and feel more hostile towards people who believe (or look) differently than them.

In other words, when reminded about death, people can get a shitty attitude.

Knowing that, I ask you to check in with yourself right now.

Does this post already seem like one you don’t want to read because clearly the author (yours truly) is an asshole or doesn’t know what he’s talking about?

Watch for your bias and prejudice when considering your death.

Watch for your attitude when you read something that is different than your core beliefs.

When most people’s core beliefs are challenged, their brain cannot tell the difference between that and a physical attack.

When your core beliefs are challenged, your brain goes on the defensive as if it is being threatened.

Knowing that, be aware of it, breathe through it, and make a conscious decision to take in new information that you are under no obligation to agree with.

Whether you realize it or not, on a deep level, the need to be right (or a fear of being wrong), is actually a fear of death.

Let old things die.

Let old ideas die.

You can dust them off later and bring them back to life.

For now, set them aside for a new experience.

Old Things…

Here’s an area people will certainly disagree with me.

I want you think whatever you want.

I encourage free thought and expanding your consciousness.

But before you settle into your argument about what old things are and which ones shouldn’t die, let me tell you I probably agree with you.

Does that feel better?

Less like eminent death due to challenged core beliefs?

Of course, I am NOT saying that we should just let our elders die.

I am also NOT saying that we should forget all of our past memories.

In fact, I’m not telling you to do anything.

However, what I am telling you, is that before you can progress onto becoming (as Kylo Ren said), “. . . what you were meant to be,” you’re gonna have to let some shit go.

The most important thing to let go of is fear.

I think the next important thing is expectations.

And finally, you need to let go of your old identity.

Fortunately, for you, these three things are all related.

There’s a wonderful short story called the The Parable of the Trapeze by Danaan Parry. Here’s a short video (6 minutes) that tells it to music:

The Parable of the Trapeze. https://youtu.be/HWvV5N4hOGc

The basic message is that before the trapeze artist can get to the next trapeze bar, they have to let go of the one their holding.

The bar they’re holding is familiar, and they are scared of falling to their death if they let go.

But, as stated, the only way to get to the next trapeze bar is to let go of the current one they’re holding.

And if you are the trapeze artist, and you let go, trusting you will get to the next one, you don’t fall…

You learn to fly!

The only way to let go of fear is to face it.

Courage is not the absence of fear.

It is taking the action in spite of the fear.

The root of the word “courage” is “cor” which means heart.

Courage is literally “having heart.”

Your HEART is your SHIELD!

Trust the motherfucker!

(Yes, I called your heart a motherfucker)

The Heart of SHIELD

Let go of your expectations…

Yes, dream, visualize, manifest!

But don’t expect shit to go your way exactly how you imagined it.

Let go of expectations.

People will disappoint you.

There will be traffic.

You’ll have to cancel plans.

When you let go of how you think things should go, and go with flow (see yesterday’s post (https://greenleaf4life.blog/2022/05/26/row-your-boat/), you are free to trust the Universe or Life or whatever you believe will work things out.

Everything you let go of opens you to a new experience.

This includes letting go of your identity.

What exactly, you may ask, is your identity?

There are several experts who could give you a better answer than me.

I think of identity as the narrative and scripts I tell myself.

For years, I was the traumatized, ugly kid.

The scripts included, “Why try anything, I’ll always fail, I’m too fucked up for a loving relationship, I’m unlovable, I’m stupid, I’m alone.”

These are the old narratives downloaded into me by my shame-based father who never healed from his trauma.

He was a victim of life’s circumstances and made me one, too (until I decided I’m not a victim).

He passed on his bullshit to me.

And that’s what those things were… HIS bullshit.

They were lies.

They were the lies he believed which eventually led to his demise.

Someone downloaded those scripts into him and he suffered and ultimately perished because of them.

Your old scripts will destroy you if you do not write healthier ones!

I’m beating around the bush here because my mom reads these, but let the truth be known, his quality of life led him to suicide.

I feel great empathy and compassion for the man.

And…

I refuse…

I FUCKING refuse

To go down like that!

Let old things die.

I am not that fucked up little boy he made me believe I was.

I have vision, passion, and talent.

The only way for me to begin to transcend those limiting, self-defeating beliefs was to let old things die.

Let the old narrative and scripts die.

They do not serve me.

They do not serve you.

The only way the old scripts and narrative serve you is by fueling you to change and allowing you to help others with a shared lived-experience.

The way I let them go is by having heart (facing fears), letting go of expectations, and taking the action that my spirit yearns for me to do!

I refuse to be satisfied with the status quo or hiding behind by fears.

And you don’t have to either.

It’s Already Broken

Ok, so I got off track a little on an impassioned rant.

I actually teared up a bit talking about dad and manifesting my life!

This is heart shit, Sacred Calling, and it gets me up in the morning to write

Every

Fucking

Day!

I want to pass on this fire to you!

Ok…

Now, back to the topic at hand (it’s all related, really 😉 ).

What, you may ask, is “already broken?”

Everything you cherish is already dead.

No, this is not the beginning of my nihilistic, emo rant or lyrics from Nine Inch Nails (although it certainly could be).

This is the concept of impermanence.

Tara Brach (a spiritual leader) tells the story (of probably a Buddhist monk) who’s asked if he’s worried about his beautiful crystal goblet falling and breaking.

The monk replies that the goblet is already broken.

He speaks of the inevitability that it will break.

His role (attitude) is to enjoy the beauty of the goblet right now.

In other words, when you cling to something because you are afraid of losing it, you miss out on the beauty of it right here and now.

Accept that whatever you love or cherish will eventually die or go away.

Everything!

That’s the cycle of Life.

That is the essence of Impermance.

Fear of loss prevents connection.

Let go of what you love.

Embrace it here with a loose grip.

As Ram Dass (another spiritual leader) said, “Be here now.”

This can be applied to your life, your relationships, you dog, your job, your car…

Let your attachments to them go.

Imagine them going away, and appreciate them here and now.

I am NOT saying to not love people or pets or like things.

I AM saying to loosen your grip on them.

You will die.

Everyone you know will die.

Good and bad are not real.

Death is neutral.

You can make it mean whatever you want it to.

Why not just accept loss as part of Life?

Breathe in and breathe out…

Your life will feel so much freer when you stop clinging to it.

Surrender.

Open your arms.

Love with abandon.

Let go of the old trapeze bar.

And begin to fly!

Let Go and Fly!

Conclusion

Ok, so you made it through this post!

It may have challenged you…

But did you die?

I hope part of you did.

I hope the part of you that tells you “I can’t…” fucking died!

Remember, none of us are getting out of this alive.

Regardless of your beliefs, this body will perish whether you like or not.

Why not try letting go of the fear of dying?

Your fear of dying is actually your fear of living.

Your fear of living is actually your fear of dying.

Embrace the impermanence of this life.

Face your fucking fears and grow!

Don’t sit on the sidelines of your life telling yourself, “Someday, I’ll . . .”

Someday will NEVER fucking come!

Let go of your fears by facing them.

Let go of expectations by accepting shit does not always go your way, but the Universe is conspiring to give you everything you want and need (if you go for it).

Be fucking grateful!

Embrace the beauty of each moment like it’s your last. (It just may be).

Tomorrow is not a guarentee.

What do you want your eulogy to say about you?

Write down your eulogy and do what it says.

Let old things die.

Become what you were meant to be.

Seize the day.

Love with abandon.

Let go of clinging.

And start flying!

Thank you for reading today’s post. Like, follow, comment, and reach out. I am also a life coach, and if you’re sick and tired of feeling sick and tired, drop me a line and we’ll get you on track!

Be well!

https://www.instagram.com/greenleaf_4_life/

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